Will You Ever Notice Me

 Here we are

Sitting side by side

Yet feel like I'm alone

And you're not here

You're always busy with something

And I can only watch you from aside

Hoping that you will notice me

Wishing you will see me

But now I know

Hope is hope

And wish will always be wish

Because you will never notice me

In The Still Of The Night

 In the still of the night

Looking through out the window

All I see is your reflection

Playing memories of ours

In the still of the night

A bottle in my hand

Yet your shadow appear before me

Smiling so beautifully at me

In the still of the night

Never know why

Though I know you're not thinking about me

Yet I always think of you

Four Essential Things In Life

Love, Honesty, Trust & Loyalty...

Those four things which define what kind of a person we are...

Love will make us try to do good things we can with all heart and not hurting others.

Honesty wil make us to be true and do everything in the right way.

Trust will make us not to do things with confidence and decent.

Loyalty will make us to know boundaries between what we should or shouldn't do.

2016.. been a while since last time I posted. Gosh finally come to the lowest time of my life when I start to doubt about everything in life... even doubt about myself..

Sometimes I wonder when the last time I did have self esteem, my pride... seems like nowadays I just live my life day by day.. wondering if it's wrong... don't know what to do anymore... seems like nothing's I do right...

When would I see the bright light through my path...

wow 2013... it's been 5 years since last time I posted... so many changes happened yet so many thing undone.... suddenly feeling to write again... so here it is

Time flies
Yet still here I stand
Waiting...
Waiting for nothing

Yet still here I stand
Wishing...
Wishing for something

Hoping that you"ll reach me where I stand still....

Just a thought

Suddenly it's been half a year already passed since last time I wrote... still same conditions, still same thoughts still same routines yet wondering when will it change...

I Just Love U

Can't sleep again... gosh really can't get U out of my head... I should know that I'm not worthy, I should realize that U're out of my league.. especially U've got someone else by your side and I should just leave both of U alone... but why can't I stop loving U? Why can't I stop caring about U?

I really don't know why... I just know that I'll always care for U... U said nothing last forever? Well, U'll just never know how much I care for U... 

I just love U and that's all I know....

Did U Ever Know???

Gosh again after all this time... just bcause my phones were off n U think that I lie to U again? Did U ever know that your call is what I've always waited for? Did U ever know how much I wanna be with U or just to hear your voice? Did U ever know that I could spend all my time just to be with U? I did ever lie to U, but don't U think that everyone can change? Don't U think that I can change? Don't U ever know that I always try to live my life up to your expectation no matter even if U don't care at all about what I do?

I Don't Know...

Today I heard that U're dating him already... suddenly everything becomes dark n blank... I know I should get out of your life but why seems like so hard for me to do it? Seems like I still wanna care for U n do everything I can for U? Just hope that whatever I do won't be troubles for your relationship... or maybe better for me to end everything?

I really don't know.... I really don't know whether this is the right thing to do or not... I just know that I do love U so much n never be able to get rid of U outta my mind... I don't even know what to think or what to do now... gosh... I really never ask for this feeling... 

U ever asked me why I love U so much... well honestly, I really don't know.. though U never even care for me, still all I wanna do is to make U happy.. just wish could see your smile everyday.. U know why? because it always brights up my day... even the darkest one...

Do U know something? Since I met U, I always wanna be the best I can for U... I always wanna be with U, even though we just chat n doing nothing... but I always treasure every moment I can spend with U... I'm always happy just to hear your voice or listen to your stories...

I do realize that I'm hurt.... I do feel so hurt inside... but I really don't know why I can't get U out of my head n just stop loving U.... especially U're with someone else now n already happy...

I really don't know...